“There are very few human beings who receive the truth, complete and staggering, by instant illumination. Most of them acquire it fragment by fragment, … like a laborious mosaic.” –Anais Nin
From a distance this cottage in Louisiana looks like a normal house, but the siding is made from thousands and thousands of pottery shards, glass and tile.
When you get closer you can see that each small piece is unique. Each one is broken, some are big, some are shiny, some are softened with age.
Rick Hanson, author of Buddha’s Brain and Just One Thing, writes: “Each of us is like a mosaic, with lots of lovely tiles, some that are basically neutral, and a few that could use a little-ah-work. It’s important to see the whole mosaic. But because of the brain’s negativity bias, we tend to fixate on what’s wrong with ourselves instead of what’s right. If you do twenty things in a day and nineteen go fine, what’s the one you think about? Probably the one that didn’t go so well.”
This tendency is exacerbated when we become parents. We are supposed to become experts overnight. Of course, we aren’t. But the pressure to get it right is enormous.
Think about all the ways you took care of your child today, the times you were patient, loving, kind. Probably there were too many to count. Now, think of the moment you lost your temper, rushed through something, were distracted, couldn’t listen. You probably are reprimanding yourself for that one moment instead of attending to the hundred ways you provided loving care. Reprimanding ourselves doesn’t make us more patient, attentive or interested. The opposite is true; it makes us grumpy and unavailable. In contrast, by focusing on our strengths as parents, we fortify them so that they show up more, not less. We are imperfect mosaics, each of us beautiful. Beautiful mosaics are made of many small broken pieces.With awareness we can stand back far enough to see it all.
On The Mat—
Sitting on a cushion or laying on your mat, scan your body starting at your head, stopping each time your attention falls on a part of your body that is without tension or discomfort. Allow your attention to bathe this body part in awareness for three breaths. Continue until you have moved all the way down to your toes. Now allow your attention to drop in to any tension or discomfort, allow the sensation to simply be. Notice how your body is made up of many sensations, some pleasant, some not. Where are you strong and flexible, where are you weaker, tighter? Our bodies are mosaics of our life lived, our marks of growth, loss, strength and endurance. Carry this sense of your body as mosaic through your practice and see how it feels.
Off The Mat—
Notice all the ways that you shine this week. Each act of nurturing and kindness. Allow yourself to linger longer in the experience of success. Allow for the moments of discomfort and dissatisfaction and let them inform you about your humanity.
If you were a mosaic what would it look like?
“May we all feel at ease, may we all feel accepted, may we all take in the good.”
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