“Draw alongside the silence of stone until it’s calmness can claim you.” –-John O’Donohue ( lines from “Blessings for the Exhausted”)
“Behind your image, below your words, above your thoughts, the silence of another world waits.” — John O’Donohue (lines from “Anam Cara: A book of Celtic Wisdom”)
Every parent knows the thousand sounds a child makes. We are alerted to their discomforts, their pleasures, and their needs by sounds. Sometimes, we are drowning in their sounds. Sometimes, it is difficult, if not impossible, to hear our own voice. We have to find moments of silence so that we can hear our own voice to know what is important and what is just distraction.
I remember standing in the kitchen one morning. My toddler was tossing cherrios at my older son who was oblivious, eating his own cereal. I looked at the clock and it was 6:47. I was overwhelmed with the demands of caring for these two adorable and noisy little boys. Simultaneously, I felt completely aimless. A whole day ahead, responding to one job at a time. In the end, they added up to just so many fragments. I had no compass; I had forgotten what was important and why I was juggling a career with staying at home with my sons. I didn’t even think about asking for help in order to take time for me. As a result, I became more overwhelmed and more aimless. I lost sight of what was important. In order to pare down to what is essential we must have time in the silence.
Dan Siegel says about Time In for his Healthy Mind Platter, “When we quietly reflect internally, focusing on sensations, images, feelings and thoughts, we help to better integrate the brain.”
Then we can ask, “What three things are most important right now?” That’s it. Three things. Right now.
So, how to tune into the silence that gives voice to that which is important?
On the Mat—
Three things:
- Breathe
- Move
- Relax
Start with ocean sounding breath. Allow the tongue to relax up into roof of the mouth, causing a slight constriction, slowing the breath and sounding like the ocean. Uji breath. Start in Tadassana or Mountain Pose, ground the four corners of the feet into the mat, lengthen the spine. Start to slowly raise and lower your arms in rhythm with the breath. Move into sun salutation of your choice, continuing with the ocean breath. After three sun salutations, come into child’s pose and allow your entire body to relax, your breath to find it’s own natural rhythm, the mind slowing down, now there is space between your muscles, your breath, your thoughts. Stay in this open state for several moments, doing nothing. “Draw alongside the silence of stone until its calmness can claim you.”
Off The Mat—
Three Things:
- Find a special place where you can find quiet. “The silence of another world”
- Make it home base
- Visit often.
Journalling—
What three things are important right now? Write them down. Let them lead you through your day, let them change, and write them down again when they do.
“May we all find silence, may we all reflect, may we all know what is important right now….”
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